it took me a long while to get to and get use to having nothing to complain or bitch about. it was a lifestyle change. it ain’t easy keeping it easy, it takes work physically and mentally.
sometimes i find temporary pleasure in exercising energy complaining, this helps me realize things i need to address. since i am at an age and accomplishment where i can have or create anything i want complaints quickly give way to action. very very few things in regards to me that i care about are left up to someone else, and if they are i have the knowledge of the system and capability to get to that source and get what i want or need out if it. all this may or may not be an accurate assessment, hell i could even be delusional. BUT this is how i feel my every waking morning. it’s what i believe and what’s with me going thru life. my overview and my outlook. how i feel about life and how i feel life treats me.
no doubt an “easy” life makes you soft. i remember my days of hustle and worry about jobs and where i was gonna live. woke up everyday with a major mission and the energy and drive that goes with such threats to one’s livelihood. if i had anything i had a definite goal. damn near every waking moment. for years. i got thru it. took about 2-3 years of being fairly secure to adjust. it was hard being a temp employee for so long to let my guard down and relax. still kind of hard to believe i am a permanent employee and the security that goes with that. but i did it. i worked for it and i earned it. but still it’s hard to believe and im sure i have not yet fully realized what it means. the life i have now vs 8 years ago or so. wow, it’s been 8 years of steady employment at various places. i remember when things clicked and i got on it. or in it. for whatever reason it felt different chasing them jobs. my attitude or sum’n changed. even when i had jobs i knew that were beneath me i knew it was part of building my work history.
