Mar 10

Haterade Is An Indicator a

20150202_173730Haterade is an alert and indicator system. Not that I actually “hate” anything, but I found when I catch myself not being happy for something it’s because I’m lacking something that I desire. So I recognize that and go get it. I refocus that energy.

Then my irritation and irritability goes away and all is right with the world again.


Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Mar 10

“Want” Is More Difficult To Identify For Me Than “Need.”


For me and my situational. Changing aspects of my life coming together in different ways. This is like that now, that done got right now, etc. Interesting combinations in an equation full of variables. I was fairly good at math and this being my 53 summer, 32nd in California I think I got the game down just enough but hopefully not too much…

What do I want? What do I very really want?

Want, not need. Need is easy and is usually very apparent. But want at this time of my life is sometimes difficult to determine. Which leaves things wide open, which is good in ways. Being wide open for opportunity and ready for it.

Many things are in place

And are established

I want something. Or I’m so use to wanting something that I miss or want something to want. For a good while it had been wanting a job or better employment. Or a desire for a particular type of relationship. Those having been satisfied at least temporarily there is nothing that I’m chasing and the waters are calm.

The motor is off and the sails are down. There is no where to be because it feels like I’m there.

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Jan 11

Enjoying Feeling Challenged

1014962_10153063240957125_3340897396544832780_o (1)Training wheels coming off.
Being challenged and it’s been awhile.
Game step up, turn it on time.
I’m not use to being not the best.
Makes me work at it harder.

I compare myself to the best one from the very instant I start.

To the point they can smell it on me how hard I go at it to be on the level with the best

Especially when I have respect for what I am doing and a part of.

Feels like no time to breathe. But it’s a self inflicted pressure that has to be monitored. There has to be a balance to prevent burn-out.But when I’m going after it being inside it my focus and concentration levels can take me thru the roof. It’s good to be challenged at this level. Sometimes the drive and struggle doesn’t feel good, and even that’s good. Turn it up its go time for real…

What makes it self pressurized is the magnitude of the opportunity. The significance of being in a very particular situation and the impact success will have on your life.

Maintaining an intensity and focus while understanding sociability and likeability factor into your grade. The are times when you can be too good and know too much and this can be intimidating. The right balance of sensitivity, personality, intensity, determination and ambition…

Well at least I didn’t eat any sweets. Saturday night and this not good feeling of apprehension towards the upcoming challenging work week after tomorrow is an unpleasantly pleasant feeling to have. The super good $$$ seems to take a back seat to my feelings of being successful. And I think that a good thing. A little bit of “worry” is not only normal and necessary but could and should be a positive influence. Taking a break from my usual “I’m jeffery” level confidence is refreshing. The billions of years of evolution in us is a beautiful thing… Us having worry ain’t no accident


Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Jan 11

Me And Feeling Good

FB_IMG_1414732213902Yeah, I’m feeling really good. It’s like I’m back to being deeply in love with life “again.” It’s an euphoria I’ve had before.And it’s not loving life and who I am and what I can do but “in love” with it like it was a girl friend
I can feel the energy shooting thru my body literally. Like adrenaline.

I was just out driving around in the rain for like an hour listening to my music and me singing it when i got your message and I pulled over and parked just to reply and enjoy the rain.
It made me think about why am i in this way and I thought I’m basically doing all the things I’ve ever dreamed of in life.

And I’m free to express my happiness and enthusiasm openly again. I can let my light and energy shine and radiate. Everybody doesn’t seem to be to keen on expressing any kind of extreme emotion, even happiness. I’m not comforable being exhuberant about life around some people.

Yes, I went over all the factors involved thats why I came to that conclusion. Right down to singing the music I’ve loved so deeply for so long at Funky Fridays.
I’m exploding with energy and enthisiasm

I “need” an outlet for that zealous energy. Facebook gives me that outlet. I use to write dailys on my webpage and I have years of expressive writing. I’ve always “needed” that. Everybody is on Facebook from my family childhhod everywhere. And if you notice I am actually not talking to anybody but everybody.

When I write like that I dont expect response, so I’ll have a conversation with myself!! LOL People inbox me or tell me when they see me stuff that lets me know I’m being heard and thats perfect and in ways it doesn’t matter. It’s the feeling I get writing and expressing that gets me off.
And then re-reading it and re feeling it again. Then going thru life and creating and doing more to go higher and higher.

I’ve wanted someone to share that with but very few can “understand” it so I started writing to the universe publicly, the ups and the downs. I am in love with my experience.

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Jan 11

Us, Them And Issues I Don’t Identify With

1016889_10152953031552125_4783751452359082549_nWow, he talks white. I LOVE HIM! LOL damn I like what he said and how he said it. It explains a lot and maybe why I think the way I do about my life and myself.

Since when is knowledge of self..’talking white?!’… It would behoove you to get some…..smh

Talking white means how it’s said not what! Such enunciation and articulation though a tad new yorky. He never mentioned race

Jeffery…Why is correct speech and grammar “talking white”? Maybe you really don’t understand the message this brother is conveying…”Talking white” is yet another phrase we’ve heard growing up and we’ve internalized into being truth..people have told me I talk white or “you speak so well, (for a black girl)…I instantly shut them down and bring the truth to them..From this statement I believe that someone has told you or convinced you subconsciously that black people are dumb/uneducated/unteachable…you’re putting yourself back into the box so many have helped you to get out of..I pray that you Jeffery can get your own foot off of your own blessed brother.

Yeah, I guess me and the people around me are so far “beyond” the talking white thing and its so not a problem anymore that I can joke about it, as I was doing. In fact the many times I’ve been told that I took it as a compliment and didn’t shy away or be ashamed. Yeah, I was teasing. Now what may be an issue is that just like I’m beyond that problem I may be beyond the people with that problem.

Why would it be a compliment? You still don’t get it. It should be understood that EVERYONE should speak correctly, automatically. It should not be a rarity to encounter a brother or s sister who has command of the language. How about this one??

Like I said, I’m beyond that battle. And maybe at a point where it’s too late for those who still think that way. I take it as a compliment because the people making that statement realize the distinction between me and them and how I carry myself. I get what they mean by “you talk white” though the phrasing may be incorrect it’s not strictly based on a racial issue.


No, I don’t agree with that. There are us,’ thems and we’s at all levels. It’s up to me to find where I fit in and what and who I resonate with. And let me say I agree with your basic premise, and I practice what you are saying, I may not take it as that serious at this point. I simply can’t identify with certain issues. But I’m glad that we have others who do. I’m grateful even. Yet we are all in this together and I support everything and everybody to a vast degree

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Dec 18

Dailys 2014-12-18

20141126_130903doing anything but eating. well not any thing. playing with my music. going back to work and my mixing sessions on the commute got me back into it. i haven’t eaten after work this week, i dont think. been going to bed hungry. subway got 3 of their 12 inch sandwiches on sale for $4.36. i’ve had the meatball marianara, the veggie and today the cold cut sandwich. spending money like that for lunch aint bad if thats all i spend for the day on food. oh yeah ate a small pack of some kind of gummy candy today. in the lobby at work is a bowl of apples i usually grab one of each day but not today. have been only drinking water, not even my diluted fruit drinks.

weight gain season in full effect im doing well. stopped smoking them black and milds AND have controlled my eating habits. “habits” is the key word here as in the habit of doing something to or for the body to stimulate it. scale said 229.6 today which is damn good considering my recent fried chicken, potato ships and bread- oh god the bread was soooooooo good binges.

i mean overall im very satisfied. im doing exactly what i want and have realized i am where i am because thats what i wanted. not too many things happen to me that i dont ask for. very very few and it may not be in words but in deeds. and its good because ive come to be and act as i feel. i dont lie or hide anything. sure i dont go broadcasting every drop of my business all over but i do blast how i feel and what im feeling very freely. i cherish my ability and freedom to do that. and i mean a lot. a very lot lot..

i probably worked hard to get where i am. and i say probably because i enjoyed it so it really didnt seem like work. i feel ive earned the position in life i have and for whatever reason im very proud of where i am and what i do. it may not be much in comparison but its EXACTLY where and what i want. this changes and the new job i have plays a large part. and its not so much the job, but the career and resume ive built to go out and get a job like that. that plays a big part in how i see my station in life.

my Steelers are doing they thing, if they win this week we are in the playoffs. im getting regular doses of proper funk music played right and am even producing music and developing the skills to make better funk music. the idea of comparing “being in love with what i do vs being in love with who i do” came into my head last week. definitely a song in there. i love that in love feeling and have learned to use it to be not just happy but productive. years ago i figured out a way to be “in love” with life and get that feeling without being dependant on the whims or availability of another person. dont get me wrong there is nothing better than being in love with another person that is about the highest you can get. but it aint easy and it comes with responsibilities and pressures and it takes a certain amount of work. not that this work aint rewarding in itself and not that the ups and downs dont add to the excitement, but….

there are moments when im alone where it feels like absolute perfection. a contentment so deep its hard for me to think anything can rival it. but there are also moments when i long for companionship, and maybe just in a very temporary and immediate sense with the idea of a longevity. the idea it will last must be there even if i know in 20 minutes im gonna wanna get out of it.

  •  and go back to my apartment and be alone for like whole weekends at a time. not seeing another human being face to face or even venturing outside my one bedroom spot.
     then turn on a dime and take it to a club or concert and turn it out walking around completely freely uninhibitedly expressing and absorbing sensitive yet projecting
  •  working and public transiting i get plenty of social interaction and exchanges not to mention via the social medias and online and of course the funky things i do when the music gets turned up to dance my way out of any constrictions
  •  closing my eyes and that dance i do alone oh how the music moves me
Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Nov 21

Los Angeles Funk! (do y’all be funkin’ over there?)

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Oct 16

Never Missing A Beat

Damn I be getting it! NEVER MISSING A BEAT!! now you see why I get so frustrated when I go see funk and don’t find rhythm like this?

My idea of the Motor Booty Affair is gettin’ some and EVERYBODY is hittin’ rhythms like this. I will always keep this dream alive!
15 mins · Like

Dig how I snap my neck double time on the beat. Every part of my body is in time on time.
12 mins · Edited · Like

The idea is to be surrounded by humans in a visually pleasing groove yet on their own individual rhythm. To experience this kind of stimulation would be a heaven to me

Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Aug 23

Pharrell’s “New Black”

Pharrell Williams

“The New Black doesn’t blame other races for our issues,” said Pharrell, one of the world’s most successful musicians, to Oprah, billionaire queen of the world. “The New Black dreams and realises that it’s not pigmentation: it’s a mentality and it’s either going to work for you or it’s going to work against you. And you’ve got to pick the side you’re going to be on.”

“This is the new black. Oprah Winfrey: That’s the new black. She’s a black billionaire. President Obama: He is a black American president. Regardless of what you think about him, this is his second term. That’s the new black. LeBron James: the first black man ever shot on a Vogue cover, a black man. Me: a guy that’s written a song at 40! Nominated for an Oscar, four GRAMMY awards — at 40! That’s the new black!”


Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Aug 20

Those That Are Being Left Behind

People walking around with their hands in the air simulating surrender. What if it comes out Mr Brown was attacking and rushing the officer after sucker punching him and trying to take his gun? Unfortunately,  at this point these people and anyone else who has printed “surrender” t-shirts will not believe or accept anything other than Mr Brown surrendered. 
20140709_075731I think no matter how deep the sympathy for this community and its circumstances, people- black or white aint going for defending a thug. thats simply going too far. if it comes out mr brown provoked this attack i imagine the wound it will leave on this community. but it wont be as deep as when the time comes that black people, what i call the new black, begins to openly separate itself from those blacks who have seem to be left behind (for a lack of a better word). the new black is very very very slowly beginning to voice disagreement with some of the philosophies, behavior and actions of certain black folk, which includes gang members, criminal, corrupt church leaders, etc.

i thought of this just the other day. the change will come when black folks begin “snitching” on the undesirable element of the black community. we need the help of law enforcement to clean out certain elements of black neighborhoods where thugs and criminals are sustained because black people in good standing (lack of better word) stay quiet. once we begin “cleaning out” our own communities respect and perceived racism- racism which is screamed by the negative elements in the black community as cover will subside.the new black is beyond racism, beyond slavery and the past. its not forgotten its just handled in a different way and isnt a debilitating mindset or burden.

yeah i love black folks but long ago i stopped defending them when i thought they were “wrong” or contradicted some thing i believe in. yeah i would commit the sin of criticizing my brothers in front of whitey. taking whiteys side when whitey was right and not defending the black man. yeah ive looked at black folk who expected me to lie for them just cause they were black like they were crazy and that they just insulted me. and oh yeah i was called uncle tom and uncle ruckus and still am. friends and family have unfriended me because of this stance.

Black people that stay within like minded black people have created their own reality. (many groups do this not just blacks) and they play the race card and believe so deeply in racism that they may never be able to assimilate into a white society.

In America we are raised on racism. not that we are all racists, but we are all racially aware one way or another. its just a part of life here.

And i must clarify that the new black will separate from not only the criminal element, but blacks who have a stuck in time mentality. the divide will be philosophical and based on a major difference in belief systems. and i dare to say the new black will be much less religious and more spiritual. almost atheistic science, knowledge and experience based. the new black will be beyond Jesus (white or black). it will have a modern sharp practical understanding. and i imagine a tad economically conservative.

there are a number of cities like Ferguson in America. and they are fighting for their lives and to be a part of the future. but it is going to be tough because they dont fit in to the future. they dont speak the language or know the protocol. and after so many generations a high percentage may lack the capacity to aggressively be a contributing part of the future of mankind. there are white and black and people in every country all around the world in this condition. black people here have the race card and can use it to instill white guilt for now, but thats gonna change soon. what do we do for the poor and disenfranchised people of the world?

evolution says everybody ain’t gonna make it. we can’t save everybody.

but we do not have to decide who will make it and who wont. nature will do that for us no matter what we do

the disenfranchised don’t participate in the system so they are not represented




Share this:
Share this page via Email Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter

Permanent link to this article:

Older posts «